stupid day

This was a day when everything at home went wrong. I woke up late. I couldn't find my keys. I yelled at my kids. I forgot to grab son's blanket once we were finally heading out the door. There wasn't coffee. Then I burned my hand when I made it. Then there were some meetings, and I was actually productive at work, then it was time to get the kids and finish Christmas shopping errands.

(Does anyone else have warning klaxons in their heads?)

In the course of our shopping excursion, two separate glass objects were broken, the things I needed to purchase DIDN'T get purchased, and I turned into that obnoxious bitchy mom that I hate being. What a freaking stupid day this was.

I hate being a yell-y mom. HATE HATE HATE. It makes me feel like a mean and terrible person, and turns into a spiral of loathing that is difficult to interrupt. Humor can pause the downward spiral... throwing things makes it worse. Mostly, I wish I wouldn't even get so angry. But I do... and there's a voice in my head that tells me I suck for it. It's hard to ignore it.